Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist
Eva K. Fernandez, LMFT
You Want Connection.
Something Keeps Getting
in the Way.
Whether you’re a couple stuck in the same conflict, or an individual who shuts down before you can say what you need — this work goes beneath surface communication and into the emotional reactions that take over before either of you has a chance to choose differently.
Is This You?
When the Past Still Lives in the Present
You don’t have to have experienced major trauma to feel its effects in your relationships. Sometimes it shows up quietly — in the way you shut down, the fights that never fully resolve, or the distance that keeps growing even when you both want to feel close.
For Couples
- You have the same argument on repeat — the words change but the cycle doesn’t
- One of you shuts down. The other escalates. Neither of you knows how to stop it
- You love each other but you’re starting to feel more like roommates than partners
- You’ve tried talking about it — it always ends the same way
- You want to feel close again but don’t know how to get back there
For Individuals
- You may or may not fully understand the pattern — but you can feel that something keeps repeating
- In relationships, you either shut down completely or feel everything all at once
- You want intimacy but something in you pulls back when you get close
- You’ve done work on yourself — and yet something still feels stuck
- You’re ready for something more than insight — you want real change
You’re not broken. You’re reacting from patterns that once protected you.
Left alone, these patterns don’t fade. They harden.
Hi, I’m Eva.
I help individuals and couples with complex PTSD and childhood trauma heal through my Whole-System Healing approach
If you’re here, it’s likely because you’re tired of repeating the same painful patterns in your life and relationships — patterns that trace back to childhood wounds or unresolved trauma that never fully healed.
The arguments may look different each time, but they leave you in the same place: hurt, misunderstood, and wondering if things will ever change.
Maybe you’ve tried to fix it — worked on it alone, swept things under the rug, even gone to counseling — but the changes never stick. You understand your patterns intellectually, but when you’re triggered, all that insight vanishes and you’re right back where you started.
You’re ready for something different.
Let me guess what might be happening…
Why My Approach Works (When Others Haven’t)
Here’s what typically happens with traditional therapy approaches:
- Talk Therapy: You understand your patterns intellectually and gain valuable insights, but still get triggered just as intensely.
- Somatic/Body Work: You feel calmer and more regulated in your body, but the same destructive thought patterns keep spiraling.
- Skills-Based Therapy (CBT/DBT): You learn helpful tools that work great… until you’re activated, then they completely vanish when you need them most.
That’s because complex PTSD affects ALL THREE systems — your emotions, your nervous system, AND your thought patterns. Healing one without addressing the others is like trying to drive a car with only one working cylinder.
Here’s the truth: When you’re dealing with complex PTSD, childhood trauma, or chronic trauma, you need Whole-System Healing that addresses your mind, emotions, and body together – because healing complex trauma requires addressing where it actually lives: everywhere
RESPOND
DON’T REACT
How I Work Differently (And Why It Matters)
My Whole-System Healing Approach
I don’t just focus on one piece of the puzzle. We work on every layer — body, emotions, and thoughts — at the same time.
Here’s what we do instead:
In our sessions, we:
- Calm your nervous system using somatic and polyvagal techniques so you can stay present even when triggered
- Process emotions through trauma-informed EFT and attachment healing so feelings become information, not overwhelming floods
- Rewire thought patterns with cognitive work that actually sticks because your body and emotions are regulated enough to integrate new learning
This means:
When challenging situations arise in your daily life, you respond with clarity and connection instead of getting hijacked by old survival patterns.
The difference? Other approaches focus primarily on one system — either emotions (EFT), thoughts (CBT), or the body (somatic work). My Whole-System Healing approach addresses your mind, emotions, and body together, because healing complex trauma requires addressing where it actually lives: everywhere.
From Conflict and Distance to Connection and Trust
When we work together, it’s not just talk — it’s practice. We work through your real-life patterns in session so that when challenges appear at home, at work, or in relationships, you respond with the person you actually want to be.
This is how couples move from conflict and distance to connection and trust — creating a secure bond where you feel seen, supported, and truly on the same team.
This means you can
For Individuals
Feel safe and grounded in your own body, even during stress
- Recognize triggers before they hijack your day
- Stay present in difficult conversations instead of shutting down
- Trust your own feelings and communicate them clearly
- Build genuine intimacy without fear of being hurt or abandoned
- Set healthy boundaries without guilt or anxiety
- Live fully instead of just surviving day to day
For Couples
Spot and stop negative cycles before they spiral into disconnection.
- Repair quickly and reconnect after conflict
- Feel emotionally safe with each other, even during disagreements
- Share vulnerability without fear of judgment or rejection
- Build unshakeable trust and a sense of “we’re in this together”
- Experience love and intimacy without the fear of being triggered or triggering your partner
I Meet You Where You Are
Because Every Path is Different
Ways We Can Work Together
Whether you’re looking to heal on your own, strengthen your relationship, or connect with others on a similar path, I offer therapy and coaching options designed to meet you where you are. Each service blends trauma-informed care with practical tools — so you can create lasting change in a way that feels safe, supported, and sustainable.
EFT Couple Therapy
Trauma-informed couples therapy for partners affected by complex trauma. Learn to communicate clearly, resolve conflicts without emotional flooding, and create a secure, loving bond where both people feel safe to be vulnerable.
Individual DBT + Trauma Therapy
Heal deeply. Feel safe in your own skin. Live fully. 1:1 trauma-informed therapy to help you calm your nervous system, release old patterns, and create a life that feels grounded and whole.
Trauma Coaching
Action-focused coaching for CPTSD survivors ready to build resilience, strengthen relationships, and move toward the future they want — without being held back by the past.
Build & Bloom Relationship Group Therapy
Heal together. Grow together. Trauma-informed family therapy to improve communication, repair trust, and break unhelpful patterns — so your home feels more connected, respectful, and supportive
Taking The First Step
Three Simple Steps to Begin Your Healing
STEP 1
Connect
Schedule a free consultation call via my online calendar or give me a call at 516.900.3072. This is where we begin — just two people talking about what’s been going on and what you want to change.
STEP 2
Explore
We’ll talk through the trauma patterns that keep showing up and how they’re affecting your relationships, work, and daily life.
STEP 3
Collaborate
In your first session, we’ll start using proven, evidence-based strategies to calm your nervous system, shift deep-rooted patterns, and strengthen your relationships.
Now also serving clients in the Netherlands (Amsterdam & nationwide) online
For many expats, the stress of adjusting to a new country can magnify old wounds and create new strains in love and life. Long waitlists and language barriers can make finding the right therapist feel impossible – especially one who understands complex trauma.
That’s why I now offer specialized trauma therapy for English-speaking clients in the Netherlands — so you don’t have to navigate these challenges alone.
[Learn More About Therapy for Clients in the Netherlands →]
